If you really want something in this life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers

Dan Castellaneta
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Ah, sweet pity. Where would my love life have been without it?

Dan Castellaneta
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I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.

Dan Castellaneta
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I'm having the best day of my life, and I owe it all to not going to Church!

Dan Castellaneta
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I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for TEN MINUTES.

Dan Castellaneta
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All normal people love meat. If I went to a barbeque and there was no meat, I would say 'Yo Goober! Where's the meat?'. I'm trying to impress people here Lisa. You don't win friends with salad.

Dan Castellaneta
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Bart! With $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like love

Dan Castellaneta
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I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?

Dan Castellaneta
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Submitted by: TheQuoted